Holidays often rush by in a whirlwind of to-do lists, activities and overconsumption. But they’re also a great time to pause, count your blessings and give back as a family. Volunteering together helps kids learn kindness, nurture gratitude and empathy, create lasting memories, and develop connection. When kids start volunteering early, it becomes the norm and fosters lifelong traditions of compassion and caring, says psychologist Dr. Jennifer Ajosa, of New Jersey-based Baker Street Behavioral Health.
VOLUNTEERING HOW-TOS
Start small. “Introduce your child to volunteer work slowly and in small doses when they’re young,” advises Pascack Valley mom Allison Berkowitz, who began involving her daughter Skyler, now 15, when she was 8.
“I love helping and making people happy,” says Skyler. She recommends engaging young kids through fun, simple projects—collecting donations, helping stock backpacks, drawing pictures. Chances are once they start, they’ll be hooked by the feel-good rush that comes from giving.
Match interests. Pair activities with your kids’ personality and passions. Let kids choose a cause they care about. Have an animal lover? Try an “Adopt a Pet” event or help out at a shelter. A crafty kid? Make holiday cards for soldiers. Is your teen environmentally conscious? Join a town-wide cleanup. Junior chefs can bake cupcakes for a charity sale.
Keep it age-appropriate. Sometimes just showing up has impact. Hillsdale community leader Melissa Mazza-Chiong doesn’t commit her sons, Matteo, 11, and Julian, 9, to hours-long activities. Instead, she and her husband include them in smaller tasks like delivering toys to local dropoffs or helping set up at events. “It lets them understand what giving means in a way that’s real, manageable and age-appropriate,” she explains.
Carolyn Amores, a Bergen County mom of Landon, 5, and Hunter, 3, agrees. Last winter she and her husband handed out sandwiches and toiletries to the homeless in NYC. Her kids, too young to go along, helped pack the bags. “They contributed in their own way to the best of their abilities,” she says.
Tailor activities. Hands-on tasks—decorating a children’s hospital ward or handing out treats at community events—make the experience engaging and memorable for little ones. Older kids can take on more significant roles, like organizing drives or serving meals, which help them understand the deeper purpose behind volunteering. Lean into their temperament. Some enjoy group settings; others prefer one-on-one interactions or behind-the-scenes tasks.
Know the rules. Many charities require that volunteers be 18+. Some welcome helpers as young as four years old. Do your homework to know what’s possible where and when.
Prepare kids. “Make sure they know what to expect,” Dr. Ajosa says, and encourage kids to ask questions. Explain why a cause matters, who they’re helping and what their roles will be.
Start where you are. If you’re short on time or resources, no worries. Offer what you can—an hour, a few items or simply your presence. As Mazza-Chiong says: “My hope is that as my boys get older, they’ll take on bigger roles. But for now, I focus on what they can do.”
Create teaching moments and spark conversations. “Encourage reflection by talking about the experience on the way home,” says Megan Muller, director of Volunteer Programs at Jersey Cares. “Simple conversations—around what you did, who it helped and how it felt—can turn a one-time act of service into a lasting desire to support their community.”
Do your own thing. Acts of service don’t always have to be official or organized. You don’t need a signup sheet to:
- Shovel a neighbor’s sidewalk.
- Drop off pizzas at a firehouse.
- Make a blessings basket with all the fixings—including a frozen turkey—to surprise a family in need.
- Buy stocking-stuffer toiletries to hand out at a women’s or family shelter.
- Organize a coat drive with friends.
- Adopt a family through a giving tree and shop together for their wish list.
- Do a reverse advent calendar (add one food item to a donation bin each day of December).
Make it a tradition, not a chore. Frame volunteering as something you get to do, not something you have to do. “If volunteering feels more like a meaningful opportunity rather than an obligation, it’ll be more meaningful, Muller says.
“Making a difference in someone’s life will make you want to continue year after year,” says Berkowitz.
Carry it forward. Kids learn by example. Mazza-Chiong grew up inspired by her grandparents, who gave what little they had to those with even less. “During the holidays, they would bring food, clothes, even small toys to people in need,” she recalls. “They showed me that you don’t need a lot to give. It just takes heart and action.”
Family-Friendly Volunteer Opportunities
• Local houses of worship, schools, townships, libraries, shelters
—Nayda Rondon is a lifestyle, wellness and parenting writer, a children’s book author and a Hillsdale mom.
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